So I have an irrational fear of phone calls. Kind of like Gru in Despicable Me 2.
I have no idea where this fear came from! Luckily I don’t have a flamethrower, so I’m still making phone calls for building up my ministry partner team. BUT this is how I feel. Phone calls are weird because there’s no visual cues to pick up on, and you never really know if the person’s going to pick up or not.
My dad asked his high school boys’ Bible study how many of them were afraid to talk on the phone. Nearly 3/4 of them have the same fear as me! Then my mom asked her high school girls what their biggest fears were, not even mentioning the phone. Two of the five said that talking on the phone was what they are most afraid of! Apparently I’m not alone here. It’s even got an official name: “telephonophobia.”
Ok, so it’s not to the point of a phobia. But it’s there. And I’m trying to figure out the root of it. I think that most of it comes down to not trusting God. I’m generally really awkward on the phone, and I’m afraid people will think worse of me when in reality I’ll probably just give them a good chuckle. When I call someone , I am afraid of what they might think of me when I ask for a chance to share what I’m doing with Cru.
I don’t need to be afraid. I can rest in who I am in Christ. I can trust the Holy Spirit to speak through me to the people I call. “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” (Eph 2:10). I know that God has called me to serve with Cru next year, and I can trust that He will make it possible. “He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.” (1 Thess 5:24).
Makes me think of this song…
“I could hold on to who I am and never let You
Change me from the inside
And I could be safe
I could be safe here in Your arms and never leave home
Never let these walls down
But You have called me higher
You have called me deeper
And I’ll go where You will lead me Lord”